The more I fly, the more I fear

My first memory of being on a plane was when I was 5 years old. Since then, other than a couple of years during secondary school, I’ve spent every year of my life regularly travelling by plane. In recent years with work I started using frequent flyer cards and have actually accumulated enough miles to buy a flight (although I haven’t spent them yet!).

Last year while on my 6 month jolly around the world (it feels so long ago?!) I was on a plane pretty much every other week, on various airlines and experienced the best and worst of what flying has to offer. The point of all this? Well, I thought the more you fly the more you get used to it no? …HELL NO!

I am steadily becoming a more nervous flyer and I don’t get it. I can’t sleep properly, my mind can’t settle, every bump makes me wonder if something is wrong, I have to put my earphones in as I wonder about the noise changes in the engine and what that might mean?! And it doesn’t start when I’m on the plane, it starts the night before I fly. I’m clearly turning into a wimp! WTF?! It hasn’t always been like this so I’m wondering if this is a function of age? I used to look forward to flying but now, it’s slowly turning into the opposite.

I’m not going to stop getting on planes and I’m not yet so bad as to need assistance with flying (drugs etc, although a brandy in my tea does help!) but I am sick of feeling anxious.

I’ve just got home from a 6am flight from Geneva (rude time of the day) which was actually smooth as anything. But I can’t stand small planes (London City Airport can’t take the biguns) as they are more sensitive to turbulence so I was all tied up in knots while at Geneva airport. Now, as I sit in my flat and feel those knots unwinding I really wonder about this new wimpish side to my character.

I might have to go and get hypno-therapy or sutting!

(Picture is one I took from the plane on a flight from Jamaica to Barbados last year while we were flying over Grenada or St Lucia (can’t remember which). I miss my trip!!)